{Live} You Know You’re A Mom When . . .
March 16, 2011 in All Posts, Laugh
You know you’re a mom when:
- You can pick up your 30 pound 9-month old from his crib and nonchalantly let him vomit the entire contents of his high capacity stomach onto your face, into your hair and all over your shirt;
- You stand there quietly while he pukes out nine ounces of formula, five ounces of babyfood, three strawberries, a few blueberries, three honey tangerine slices and three ounces of apple juice without batting an eyelash;
- You don’t even blink when some of the chunks slide down your chest and into your bra;
- You have mastered the art of walking to the bathroom without spilling a drop of the mess on the carpet;
- You don’t miss a beat after hosing the two of you down, and run out dripping and naked to the refrigerator to fill a bottle of apple juice for your screaming toddler, who is ready to bolt out of her 3-day old toddler bed any second now because you’re taking too long;
- You skillfully maneuver your toddler back into her bed (in the dark) (still dripping and naked) (oh, and still holding your baby - also dripping and naked) and say “Night night“;
- You deftly shove your baby into a onesie, footie pajamas, a sleepsack and a sweatshirt while simultaneously toweling off and shimmying into some pajamas;
- You get the baby down in one fell shove of the bottle (this time only half-full);
- And at the end of it all, you laugh (instead of cry), thinking about how much you love your two little munchkins.
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Chrissy – who has written 426 posts on The Outlaw Mom® Blog - Creative Living in a Conventional World.
[…] less than 1.5 years has thrown me for a bit of a loop. The contrast between life before kids and life after two under two is ever so stark and has me loving, hating and laughing at the differences between now and then. […]
Love your blog. You are a clever & funny girl. I don’t know how you have time but keep it coming — so entertaining.
Glad my trials and tribulations are keeping you entertained
Don’t worry, the munchkins will keep the blog fodder coming . . . double time!